Happy Day

Ryan got to go to Game Stop today to spend a gift card that he had.  As we were leaving with 2 games in his hands, he yelled, "I'm in the world of milk and honey!"

But You Like Santa's Tummy!

I picked up a container of french fried onions at the store today and said, "Man.  I love these.  I could just eat this whole thing right here."
Luke looked disgusted and said, "Oh no.  Then your tummy be SO fat!"

Pictionary for Pros

Playing Pictionary with Luke is difficult - partly because he can't read so he makes up things to draw.  You can imagine I had trouble guessing the following items he drew:
Worm mouth
Tarantula
A duck with 6 arms and 6 legs
Dog
A person with ears
Princess
Elephant acorn
A bug with 6 heads
Water
A hand with no head

The only one I even got close to was the tarantula - his drawing did have a bunch of legs so I guessed a spider!

Big Turkey

Here is a short story by Ryan Stout:

Big Turkey
Once upon a time there was a big turkey.  That was very fat.  That was poisons.  And cartages.  To bad for him case he was in prison.   he was in prison because he robed.  but they found out he was inanest.  he lived haply ever after.

Translation - Once upon a time there was a big turkey.  That was very fat.  That was poisonous.  And contagious.  Too bad for him cause he was in prison.  He was in prison because he robbed.  But they found out he was innocent.  He lived happily ever after.

Ho Ho Ho

Funnies heard while I was upstairs working puzzles and listening to Christmas music with Luke:

Me:  Hey Luke, you guys need to get busy and write your letters to Santa!
Luke:  Which letters?  All of them?  I just know some of them.  Like L and U and K and E.

Me:  Do you like this song?  It's not my favorite.
Luke:  Well then just "nor" it.  (Ignore)

Upon hearing a song that plays on an ornament he has in his room:  Hey!  I know this song!!  It play in my room!!  But oh no.  Why Santa not singing this one??

Paul Blart Mall Cop

We saw a cute sled set up at the mall yesterday so I told the boys to climb in it and I would take their picture.  At that moment, a security guard walked by and told us we couldn't climb on it.  As we were walking away, another man came over to me and said he had seen tons of people climbing on it and the security guard hadn't stopped any of them.
The boys of course started in about how it wasn't fair, he was just being mean to us, on and on.
So I told them that we don't know what was wrong with the guard.  Maybe he was just in a bad mood.  Maybe he was an OU fan and thought we were OSU fans!  (This being the morning after our pathetic football loss).
Andrew looked disgusted and yelled, "Do we LOOK like OSU fans?!?"

Fat Cherries

When I picked up Luke from church tonight, I asked him if they had a snack.  Here is his answer...

Yes.  We had a food kind of thing.  It was kind of a food thing.  It was kind of a cherry thing.  It was not a cherry.  But it was red.  It was like a cherry.  But it didn't have any fat.  And a graham cracker!

Glad to know whatever this cherry thing is didn't have any fat!

Thankful and Practical!

Here is Andrew's "what I am thankful for" list that he did at at school...
I am thankful for family, vidieo games, friends, toys, Jesus, Gregor the Overlander, Racoon, samy, and a tornado sheltor because they make my life fun.

Breakin' the Law

I was doing a run Thanksgiving morning with Hayley and needed to pick up her race packet for her.  I printed a copy of her driver's license so I could take it with me to get the packet.  Ryan saw it on the printer and yelled, "Whoa Mommy!  Are you doing something illegal??"

What did You Eat??

This morning, Luke got on the subject of how he got out of my tummy. Luckily, it's a fairly easy explanation since it was a c-section.
Luke: So they had to cut your tummy?
Mommy: Yep.
L: Did it hurt?
M: Not too much. The doctors gave me medicine so I wouldn't feel it.
L: Could they see your bones in your tummy?
M: Probably!
L: (Gasping) Could they see your food?!?

And No Mention of the Cat?

Luke was getting his tonsils out last week and the nurse was chatting with him before he went back. She asked if he had brothers and sisters and he replied, "Yes, I have 2 brothers and a sister."
The nurse just smiled but for some reason, I felt the need to explain that the sister isn't actually a person, but our dog!

More Henry Huggins

Andrew was writing out his spelling words today and one word is "tragic.". Here is our conversation about it...
Andrew - Mommy, what does tragic mean?
Me - It is something really awful and sad. Like if someone dies, that is tragic.
A - You know what else is tragic? The book Ribsy.
M - Why? Oh, is it because Ribsy is lost and can't get back home?
A - No. It's because the main character is hardly in the book.
M - Well, the book is all about Ribsy so he is the main character.
A - Henry Huggins is supposed to be in the book. It's a series!
M - I know but this one is only about Ribsy and since he's lost, he's not with Henry.
A - Well I was very disappointed Henry wasn't in it more. That's tragic.

Yet Another Lukeism

Luke handed me his pants which were inside-out and asked me to put them "inside-right."

Funny Face

This is what happens when you say, "OK, now do a funny face!"

Luke is trying to cross his eyes but has to hold his finger like that to do it...

Happy Halloween!

Things I heard during Trick-or-Treat last night...

Luke (upon seeing a TV playing in the back of someone's truck where the neighbors were gathered around watching football) - WHAT??  You can have TV outside??  WHAT??
Andrew - You should give Luke a prize or something.  He just told those people they had a nice house!
Luke (dressed as Flynn Rider) - I just saw Tapunzel.  I tried to help her.  She not let me.  She not recognize me.  (Tapunzel isn't a typo - that's how he says Rapunzel).
Luke - I LOVE sugar!

Taking Turns?

Luke and I were pumpkin bowling today - here is a conversation we had...
Mommy:  OK, Luke, it's my turn now.
Luke:  No.  It's still mine.  We get to have 3 turns in a row.
M:  Well, you already went 3 times.
L:  I know.  But now I am doing your turn.
M:  So am I going to get to bowl?
L:  Well, your turn is next.
(At this point, he takes another turn).
M:  So now it's my turn!
L:  Nope.  I need to do your turn again.  You not able to knock the bottles down.  I do it.

I Think She's Even Potty-Trained!

We asked Ryan to remember to pray for his Aunt Foof - she is in the process of buying a house and the loan/paperwork is a nightmare.
His prayer went like this...   "And please help Auntie Foof find a good home."
All I could think of is that she is like a puppy looking for adoption!!

Hot Hot Hot

Luke has been bugging me weekly at the store to buy Hot Cheetos.  His standard line is, "But Katie eats them!  She likes them!!  I like them!"
Katie is a friend at school and he apparently trusts her judgement in food since he has never actually eaten hot cheetos.
So today at the store I finally had enough of the begging and bought him a bag.
I put a few on his plate for lunch and he ate most of one cheeto before telling me that they were hot and he couldn't eat anymore.  (This was quite funny and I wish I had a video of it - lots of chewing with his mouth wide open, lots of blowing on the cheeto to cool it off and lots of milk drinking!)
So I said, "See?  I didn't think you would like these.  I'm glad you tried them but let's not have them anymore."
He replied, "But I do like them!  I like all cheetos.  They don't taste like cucumbers."

Boo!

We have had a great time in our neighborhood lately - everyone is getting BOO'D.  It's a fun game that we've never done before.  Basically a neighbor Boos a couple of other neighbors by putting treats on their porch after dark, ringing the door bell and running.  Then you are supposed to Boo a couple of other neighbors and so on.
The boys were thrilled with all aspects of this - treats, being out after dark and sneaking to neighbors porches.  The night they headed out, I wasn't feeling well so I stayed home.  When they got back, Don was laughing so hard he could barely tell me what happened.
They drove the golf cart around to the other end of the neighborhood and had the lights off to be extra stealthy.  It was pitch dark out so Ryan and Luke got out and headed up to the porch of the Booee.  Luke took it all very seriously and sneaked so carefully that it took him forever to get to the porch.  Don said he was crouched down and took a step only once every several seconds.  (To all that have seen Animal House - he looked just like John Belushi when he was sneaking up to the Presidents House).  During this, it never occurred to him that his shoes light up and the kids at the house had already spotted him sneaking up!  Don said the lights were flashing all around and Luke just kept plodding along.
Even though they were busted, Luke came back telling me how fun it was and I'm sure we'll be doing this again next year!

Howdy!

Enrollment has started for next year and it's time to sign Luke up for Pre-K.  I have already teared up at this idea - please start carrying Kleenexes for me!!

Andrew heard me talking to Luke about it and told him that the first week of school, they have Howdy Day and the kids go on stage to say howdy and tell the school their name.

I thought Luke might say no way to this but instead he is already planning it.  He told Andrew, "I gonna say this.  I gonna say, 'HOWDY KIDS!  HOW YOU DOIN?  OY!'"

And yes, it was yelled at the top of his lungs.  Check back in August to see if he follows through!

**Just like Ryan picked up some old-fashioned words from Henry Huggins, Luke picked up some British terms from Harry Potter.  OY!

He Knows How to Win a War

Luke asked Don to play "army mans" today.  Don told him sure, but he asked Luke to set it all up for him.  When Luke was ready, he got Don and told him to play and pointed to Don's army.  

See pic below - Luke's is on the left and Don's is on the right!

Doesn't seem like a fair fight...

Crayolaepidermis

Andrew Told me yesterday that if you want to color a large area, the easiest thing to do is to "peel the skin" off of the crayon and then lay it flat to color.

That's a Real Knee Slapper, Old Timer!

We were talking about girls the other day and I told Ryan that I wasn't much of a girlie-girl growing up - I was more like a tom-boy.  I asked about the girls in his class and he said most of them were tom-boys but some of them were "keen on" things like makeup and jewelry.
I laughed so hard when he said "keen on" that I choked on my dinner.  I don't know what struck me so funny (and apparently it's not that funny judging from the crickets I heard when I re-told the story to Don), but it killed me so I wanted to write it down for my own sake!
I don't know where he got it - we are listening to the Henry Huggins books that were written in the 50s and 60s so maybe from there?
As Gaddy would have said, "That's rich!"  (And I can actually hear Gaddy saying "keen on" also so maybe he was channeling him a bit!)

I'll Be Sleeping With One Eye Open

Last night I was getting Luke's pajamas on him and he commented that I wasn't doing it the way Daddy does it.
I told him that it didn't matter how Daddy did it - I'm in charge around here!
He looked very sneaky and whispered, "Only while you awake!"

Quick to Judge

Driving to karate tonight, we passed a police car that had pulled over a guy on a motorcycle.  The guy was just sitting on the back of the bike looking pathetic as we drove by.
Luke spotted this and said, "Mommy, you thinking what I'm thinking?"  Um - maybe?
He went on, "Well, I think that's a good guy or a bad guy.  I think bad guy and he's under duress!"

Two things I love about this - he's always asking if I'm thinking what he's thinking.  And to date, I can't think of a time where I was.
And he thinks "under arrest" is "under duress!"

Spot of Bubbly

I mumbled something about having a headache as I walked past Ryan in the kitchen.  I was heading for the bottle of vanilla flavoring to add to my cherry coke.  He looked up, saw the bottle and said, "So what are you getting?  Champagne?"
I think he may be a bit backwards on the champagne/headache correlation!

Name Game Part Deux

Today Luke asked me, "What is your middle name"?  I told him. 
So he said, "Then what is your last name?"
I told him it was Stout just like him.  He smiled and said, "So you are a Stoutgirl!"
This is particularly funny if you've read the previous post on names - see here!

Hay!

Heading to Sonic today, Andrew said, "I don't know why Daddy wants us to get him tea.  Tea tastes like the smell of hay.  I guess it tastes like hay too, but I haven't eaten hay, so I'm not really sure."

Talk About Benefits Outweighing the Cost!

I dressed up as Rapunzel for Luke's fourth birthday party.  When I came into the room and Luke saw me dressed up, he grinned and yelled, "I love you Mommy!"

Oh man, and you guys wonder why I like to dress up!  

He Is Getting Older

Luke turned 4 today!!  So his request last night shouldn't surprise me.  "I want a beer!"
Well, actually he was trying to ask for a beard after seeing his buddy with a face-painted-mustache.  But all the same, I guess he's not a baby anymore!!

Musical Interests

I was just doing some work on the computer and had iTunes going.  A Lady Gaga song came on, and Luke ran in and said, "Hey!  Let me listen this!  I like the Goo Goo Ga Ga song!"

A Few of Their Favorite Things

We had wildfires a bit too close to our house yesterday so we packed up a few things that we knew we wouldn't want to lose.  

This morning, I asked the boys what would be the one thing they would take if they had to grab something and go.  Luckily, they all said things like "each other" and "the animals."

But I wondered what else and this is what they said:

Ryan - "My football pads".  When I reminded him those were brand new and easily replaceable, he changed to his bike.  Finally decided on his baseball cards.

Andrew - "My DSiXL.  It's just so cool."  

Luke - "Flynn Rider.  And Rapunzel.  And the tower.  And Pascal.  And could you just go ahead and get the rest of that stuff for me?"

Costume By Proxy

Sadly, we have had many days lately where Luke decides he wants to wear "reg-ee-ur" (regular) clothes - no costume.  The pic below was one of those days.  But I knew he had regrets when it was time to leave the house and he yelled, "Wait!!  I need bring Snoopy (pronounced Nufee).  And know what?  Him need costume!!" 

Name Game

Luke and I went to "Meet the Teacher" today at his preschool.  She was showing him the room and told him to go find his name on the floor so he could see where to sit on his first day.  He went over, and since he's so very smart, he immediately found it and yelled, "There it is!  L U K E!"  Sad to say, there are 2 Lukes in the class and he had found Luke T. instead of Luke S.
So the teacher explained how there were 2 of them and asked him if he knew his last name.  Luke nodded and said, "Stoutboy."

Ugh! I've Been Kissed by a Dog!!

Today, Andrew was hugging all over Sammy (our dog).  I told him that she really likes kisses on the cheek.  He grimaced and said, "So do I have to lick her or can I just give her a person kiss?"

He's a Swiss Watch

Took Andrew and Luke to the pool yesterday evening.  As we were leaving, Andrew asked how long we had been there.  I said that we'd probably been there an hour.
He concentrated for a second and then said, "Huh.  Seems like only 59 minutes to me."

Captain Awesome

Luke's attire to go shopping the other day.  Notice the one red boot.  When I asked him why he was wearing it, he replied, "Cause I'm awesome!"

We Can't Go Back to the Mall Anytime Soon

I have to start this story by saying that we are not a racist family.  I swear.
Luke and I were walking through the mall today and saw a store that had pink mannequins.  I thought it was funny so pointed it out to him.
We then passed a store with silver mannequins.  Also worth pointing out in my opinion.
Then the sketchy part of the story...  We went in another store and while I was distracted looking for the restrooms, Luke noticed their mannequins and began yelling, "THERE'S BLACK PEOPLE!  THERE'S BLACK PEOPLE" as loud as he possibly could.
Should have seen that one coming.

Guess He Doesn't Really Think I'm Cinderella After All

I headed into the room with a mop today and Luke screeched to a halt and yelled, "Wait! I not know you know how to mop!"

Might Be Tasty?

We had frozen custard this weekend at Wild About Harry's - a hot dog and custard shop. So good. Anyway, there are a lot of pictures of hot dogs in the restaurant and they are all the kind that are supposed to look alive - faces, arms, legs and such. Luke was staring at one and said, "I want a hot dog with no eyes and no mustard."

Treasure Discovered

Today I had my mouth hanging open, laughing at something crazy Luke said. He was looking at me and did a dramatic gasp and yelled, "You have a golden tooth!"
I do. I have a crown that is porcelain on the front and gold on the back where no one should see it. He was quite impressed.

Makes Sense If You Think About It

Don was watching America's Got Talent with Ryan and saw a fairly effeminate guy singing.  After his interview, Ryan said, "There's something different about that guy.  I guess he's a Tom-Girl."

Um, I Can Hear You

I am going to the theater Friday night, so the boys will be home with Don.  Luke just found this out and excitedly asked Don (right in front of me), "Can I watch Harry Potter when Mommy not home?  The scary one?  Mommy won't let me!"

Dog Birthdays are Important

Luke's swim teacher today was commenting on how great a swimmer he is for a 3-year-old. He asked him if he was nearly 4 and Luke said, "Yep! I gonna be 4!"
The teacher asked him when his birthday is and he said, "After Sam's birthday.". Of course the teacher didn't know who he was talking about so Luke explained that Sam is our dog and her birthday was today. So the teacher asked, "Is your birthday tomorrow?". Luke said, "No. It not. It after Sam's."
I try to not speak up during lessons to avoid distracting him but this went on for a while so I had to finally help out and explain it's in September!
Happy birthday, Samantha! 15 years old today!

Future Podiatrist

Ryan was telling Luke to jump in the pool today and Luke was jumping in the shallow end. Ryan told him to jump in the deeper end, where it is 4-feet deep. Luke replied, "I not got 4 feet! I just got 2 feet!"

Skinny Dipping

In the pool last night, I heard Andrew ask Don, "Wonder what it feels like to swim without your pants on?"

Yeah I Know We Need Speech Therapy!

I was reminded this morning of something funny that happened recently.   Well, it wasn't that funny this morning when he woke me up at 6:30 on a Saturday...
Usually when Luke wakes up, he yells for Mommy or Daddy.  This morning, though, I heard him yelling, "E Doo!!  E Doo!!"
The funny part of the story is that E Doo is how he says Andrew - and it drives Andrew crazy.
We've been listening a lot to Harry Potter books in the car and one day Luke asked a question about Hermione.  And he said "Hermione" perfectly.  When Andrew heard that, he sighed and said, "Gee.  He can even say Hermione but he can't say Andrew!!"

What a Crummy Castle

I am making a castle from poster board to put on the front door for Andrew's "Zelda" party.  I think it is looking pretty good considering it is just poster board.
I had Luke look at it and I said, "So, does it look like a real castle now?"
He shrugged and said, "No.  Just looks like paper.  Just brown paper."
Hopefully Andrew will not agree!!

Another Tangled Mess

Luke suckered me into another "Tangled" toy today.  Hey, I couldn't resist - he started crying about how he didn't get to spend the night with his friend and gave me crocodile tears.  Plus, the toy is what he wanted the most at Disney but they were out.
Anyway, on the way home, he noticed that it came in a carrying bag that zipped.  He yelled, "Hey! This zippers!!  That's handy!"

Dress for the Occasion

We played four-square today and Ryan told Luke he could be the knight.  (I know, what the heck is a knight doing in a game of four-square?  If you've forgotten how goofy this game is, check my previous post.)
Luke lost his mind and yelled, "I NOT be knight!!  I not dressed that way!!"
He was right - here is how he was dressed:

First Love

Lately, when I tell Luke that I love him, he replies, "I love you first!"

Takin' Care of Business

Luke and I were working a puzzle this morning. He gathered up a handful of pieces and said, "It's good Mama - I got this part covered!"

War Games

There were an unusual amount of military planes doing training flights over our neighborhood today. Andrew and I were sitting by the pool and he noticed each one. He looked up and said very casually, "Yep. Think there must be a war today. Look at all of the planes."
Luckily he has no real concept of war and I hope he never does!

Funnies - Florida Vacation Edition

On the shuttle from parking lot to airport in OKC, Luke had a ball.  Andrew said, "I think the shuttle is Luke’s favorite ride so far!"

Once we were up in the air on the flight, Luke spent a good amount of time looking at the safety brochure. Seeing pictures of people exiting the plane, he yelled quite loudly, “Get out!! Get out!! Get out!!”

Each airport we came to for a layover, Luke sighed,  “We at the airport again?”

(It really wasn’t that many, but yes I am cheap and wouldn’t pay the crazy money for the direct flights!)

Ryan saw a group of fish and said he saw the teacher. Don asked what he meant and he said that a group of fish was a school and the biggest fish was the teacher!

We've found a new nickname for Luke who has gotten very squeaky – Beaker. 

He’s not too fond of it so don’t let him hear you call him that!

When suggested that Ryan take off his swim mask to practice diving he said, “But then I can't breathe under water.” 

I discreetly explained to Luke that he could potty in the ocean - just go to where you are under a bit, don't take your pants down and go.   He nodded and ran off towards the water excitedly.  I looked away at something and heard Don and Marilyn yelling at him. He had stepped just to the edge of the water, pulled down his swimsuit and was peeing into the water!

Random quotes that I heard and when I laughed, they were repeated over and over – “grass was good” and “Just fight the peacock!”

Normal??

Today, Ryan asked, "When am I gonna start sleeping upstairs?  That's what normal kids do!!"
I first explained that our upstairs is just a bonus room - no bedrooms.  Then of course I had to explain that he is in no way a normal kid!!

Don't Drink the Bottle of Yellow Juice

Had to spend some time in the tornado shelter yesterday.  At one point, I could tell the storms were a ways off so I told the boys to come up and use the restroom while we had a chance.  Andrew yelled up the steps, "Oh, it's okay.  I will just use the bottle down here!"
I don't know if it was the fun idea of going potty in a bottle or if he was too scared to come up.  Either way, he was kind enough to finally use our fancy indoor plumbing!

Princess Stereotypes

Andrew was so sweet and at a school auction, bought Luke a new Playmobil Snow White set.  You may be wondering why.  The kid is obsessed with princesses now.  Thanks Tangled!!
The set includes a bed for Snow White to lay on.  Luke killed me this morning when he said, "I not know why there is a bed.  Princesses not lay on beds.  They stand and look our their window."

Brainwashing Works

We were in the movie theater recently when a commercial come on that played All Together Now by The Beatles. Luke heard it and yelled, "Hey! This The Beatles! It on Yellow Submarine!". All of the adults in the crowd turned to look at him and smiled. I was SO proud!

Laurel and Hardy

Luke and I had a long conversation this morning and I have no idea what it was about or what I might have agreed to.
After a while, I started asking, "what are you saying?" To which Luke would reply, "what!"
I finally sighed and said, "Who's on first?"
Luke raised his hand and yelled, "I'm on first! How you not know that?"

Mother's Day Mementos

I had lots of wonderful items given to me on Mother's Day this year!  Here is a picture of a good portion (but not all!) of it.

I especially love the notes they wrote.  

From Ryan - 

Dear Mom,

Happy Mothers day!  you are so prity, and very nise, and your cookies are so god.

From Andrew - 

Dear Mom,

Your eyes look like grass.  Your hands feels like clouds.  Your hare feels like coten.  Your voice sounds like birds singing.  You smell like roses.  Thank you for being nise.  I love your bakeing.  My favorite time with you  is when we play bord games.  Thank you for coming today.  Your the best mom ever.

Love, Andrew

From Luke (a fill in the blank with his teacher) - 

My Mommy's favorite thing to do is...   stay home.

My Mommy's favorite food...  is a sandwich.

My Mommy always says...   I love you!

What I love most about my Mommy?   She hugs me and lays down to watch TV with me.

My Mommy is... 4...  years old.

This IS a Costume Party!

Today, Luke lost his mind to go to Target. Of course it doesn't take much to talk me into that so we went! I couldn't get him to take off his Power Ranger costume so he was all dressed up. I told him he would get hot and wish he didn't wear it but he said, "I suppose wear costume to Target!"
Wish I had a picture of his look towards me when we were leaving and saw another boy about his age wearing a spiderman costume. Luke and his new best buddy talked in what appeared to be a foreign language for several minutes while everyone around laughed!
When we got in the car, he said, "see mama - I was right!"
Yeah, kid, I know!

As a side funny... as it turns out, the real reason he wanted to go to Target was to talk me into a Tangled toy. I never get to go to e "pink" toy aisles so we had fun. He's killing his brothers by carrying around Rapunzel and brushing her hair!

Chewbacca

Luke has been asking for days to wear the Chewie costume.  We don't have one and I couldn't figure out what he was talking about.  This has been going on for days.  And very insistently.

Finally today, I figured it out.  We were cleaning up the playroom and all of the sudden he starts yelling, "There's Chewie!!  I been looking for it!!  I found it!"

I look up and hanging in the closet is an old coat that belonged to Don's grandma!  I had a good laugh and then put it on him for a picture.  He also donned my Mother's Day hat that Andrew made me to complete his ensemble.  Enjoy.

Happy Mother's Day!!

Cheeseburgers Part Deux

Cheeseburger in Paradise came on in the car again today. Luke immediately yelled, "Hey! This Andrew's song! He like it!"
I said yep and asked Luke if he liked it too.
He replied, "You gotta be kidding! I like cheeseburgers and I like paradise!!"

Harrison isn't Everyone's Favorite Beatle

Andrew and I were talking about how he is going to live with me forever and never leave me! Then for some reason, he says, "Well, if you die before Daddy, I think he is going to kick Harry out while I'm not looking."
***Harry is our cat that Don is not too fond of...

Can't Blame a Guy for Trying

As I walked in the house this afternoon, I heard Andrew say, "Oh I give up. There's no way to win a staring contest against Griffin!"
(Griffin is our bearded dragon - he practically never blinks!)

That's What I Said!

Last night, Luke asked me to watch a movie. I had a hard time understanding him to know what show he was talking about. Here is our conversation as I tried to figure it out!
Luke: We watch Johnny Time!
Me: What?
L: Johnny time!
M: I don't know that show. Who's in it?
L: Johnny time!
M: What's it about?
L: johnny time!
M: Is it a cartoon or does it have real people?
L: Cartoon.
M: OK so what is the story about?
L: Johnny time!
After many more questions and many more "Johnny time" responses, I finally went to ask Ryan. And get this, there is a show called Johnny Time starring Johnny Time and it's all about Johnny Time. Geez.

Selective Memories

"Cheeseburger in Paradise" came on the radio in the car.  I told the boys that it was by one of Papa's favorite singers.  Andrew immediately hollers out, "Hey - that's the guy that ate the dog snacks!"

Oh man, I had told them a story a long time ago about how my Dad had accidentally eaten a dog treat when my Mom left one on the counter and he thought it was a piece of beef jerky!  Of all the things I've told them about my Dad, this is the one that Andrew loves to laugh about.

Fruity Freshener

Today, Andrew had a bag of Skittles. (Again - don't judge my food choices - he had earned a prize).
As he wolfed them down, I heard him tell Ryan, "These taste just like what I think it would taste like if I could eat the air in Nana's house!"
Nana, are you hiding skittles over there??

Hairy Requests

Luke has watched a couple of movies over and over lately.  The first is Quest for Camelot.  The main character, Kaylee, has a ponytail that she wears low on her neck.  Luke started in a few days ago for me to wear my hair like that. 
"You wear Kaylee hair!  You wear Kaylee hair!  Put ponytail down!"  (My ponytails tend to be high on my head).
I had pretty much ignored him but today he asked me particularly sweetly so I did it. 
Not an hour later, he started watching his other favorite at the moment - Tangled.
I should have seen it coming when he starting insisting that I wear my hair like this main character.  Rapunzel! 
Thankfully I have no way of growing hair that long so I really can ignore this one!!

Happy Easter!!

Bok Meow!

The other day, I was talking about the Cadbury Egg commercials where the other animals are auditioning to be the Cadbury bunny.  I told the boys that my favorite part was the kitty that says, "Bok Meow! Bok Meow!"
Luke and Ryan laughed and Andrew kept saying, "I don't get it."
I started in about how the kitty was trying to say "Bok Bok" but since he was a kitty, was getting confused and throwing some "Meows" in there.
He kept looking confused and finally said, "Yeah, but why would a bunny saw 'Bok Bok'?"
Uh, yeah.  Actually now I am confused too.  Why do the animals all say that??

Picasso

Here is some artwork that Ryan did at school today.  Must have been a slow day!  

He put their initials on them - see below photo for description!

L.D. - Lightning Dragon

C. - Concrete Man

F.B. - Firebird

G.B. - Giant Bear

                                              O.F.M. - Awful Freeze Man  (my favorite - I've since reminded him that "awful" doesn't start with "O".

I.M. - Invisible Man

S.S. - Slime Snake

Nap News

This one is a "you had to be there" one to be really funny.  But I was there.  So I want to record it to always remember!!
Luke took a really long nap at school today - 2 hours.  When I went to pick him up, there was the usual chaos in the room and he was laying in the middle of the floor completely passed out.  Took me a couple of minutes to get him to wake up.
So of course, a couple of other kids were huddled around him "helping" me. 
One of them said loudly, "Jack not waking up!"
Luke opened one eye, pointed towards himself and growled, "This not Jack."

Ye Olde Number Two

Luke had a successful bathroom trip today!!!  (Yes, I am very excited!)
Even more exciting is that it was in a public restroom.  It had to be done eventually so glad we got it out of the way early on!
He was so thrilled with himself that he ran out into the hallway yelling, "I GO POOOOOPY!!  I GO POOOOPY!!!"
Only problem with this is that we happened to be at UCO in the library.  Many kind college students told him good job and I heard lots and lots of snickering. 

We Dine There Often

Andrew came in last night telling me a story about an earthquake and tidal wave in Chile.  It was quite a long story and I had to sit through it without laughing which was difficult. 
The reason for the laughter was at the beginning of the story he said, "Did you hear about the earthquake in Chile?  The country - not the restaurant!"

I Guess We Need to Hire a Clown

We are trying to limit tv time for the boys. They are crazy addicted!
No way we are even going to consider giving it up (Don and I are addicted also!), but we are at least making them keep it off for the hour before bed. Should help them sleep better.
Andrew is the only one who is completely lost without it.
In his words, "What will entertain me?!?"

My Next Career

Luke asked me today, "What are you going to be when you grow up big as Daddy?"
I said I didn't know so he hollered, "You be a power ranger!!!"

April Fools

Ryan really embraced April Fool's Day this year although he didn't really get it.
I was on the treadmill when Ryan & Andrew woke up and for at least half an hour, I saw them peeking into my room and giggling.
When I finally came down the hall, Andrew pointed a wand at me and yelled "Expelliarmus!"  Ryan then jumped out from behind the chair and threw a plastic Easter egg at me that had been filled with lego heads. Of course, it broke open and they scattered everywhere.  I acted sufficiently surprised I think.
Then there was a fake scorpion on the bar.  I pretended to be terrified and screamed.
The only one that was actually a good prank was when Ryan removed the toothpaste from Andrew's dispenser and Andrew tried for 5 minutes to get toothpaste to come out.
I think we would have had even more of these but thankfully Ryan spent the night with a friend!

Ouch!

At the Medieval Fair today, Luke got a lot of chuckles while watching the knights fighting.  After each blow, he would yell, "That's gotta hurted in the morning!"

Lost and Found

Ryan & Andrew both had baseball tournaments this weekend.  So we spent about 11 hours at the park yesterday in horribly nasty weather.  COLD.  I am still trying to thaw.
Anyway, in the hubbub of getting out of the park quickly yesterday, Andrew left his bag somewhere.  Yes, this is the bag that includes hat, bat, helmet, glove and batting gloves.
Lori came to the games today and while walking Andrew to his next game (MINUS HIS GLOVE!) she had the pleasure of hearing this Stout Boy Funny...
Lori - "Andrew, did you lose your glove?"
Andrew - "No.  I know just where it is."
Lori - "Where is it then?"
Andrew - "In my bag."

Oh if only he knew where the bag was!!!

Glad to say when we got home, we found the bag in the garage.  Honestly, this is the first time in 5 million games that he actually took something out of the van when we got home, so it never occurred to us to make sure it was in the van before we left!!

Pizza Prayers

Last night after Ryan said his prayers, Luke yelled, "Hey, You forgot to pray for Mrs. Kristin!"
I asked why she needed prayers and he answered, "Mrs. Kristin needs pizza."

Artificial Meats

Yesterday I gave Ryan a Slim Jim to eat (NO judging!!  I know they are awful for you but he gets so little protein...).
Luke asked for one but since we were driving I told him he couldn't open it until we got home.  I am sort of freaked out by choking and wanted him to have it when I could keep an eye on him.
Of course, he was obsessed with talking about it the whole way home.
Best line - "Is this thing real?"  I said yes (I know, technically it's all processed, whatever), and he chuckled and said, "You are kidding me!!"

It's Obvious that He Can't Read Yet

Lori gave Don a new shirt for his birthday that had "Sooners" printed across the front.  (If I haven't mentioned it before, we are big OU fans.  Well, most of us are but I won't mention the names of the black sheep that aren't).
Luke looked at the shirt and said, "Hey!  That says O...  S...  U!"
Oh no.

We Share a Love of Wedding Cake

Our cousin, Caitlin, got married this weekend!!  Luke had a couple of funnies at the wedding...

During the first prayer, in his best loud stage whisper, Luke asked, "Where's the cake?!?"

When I took him up to watch them cut the cake, he gasped and asked, "Who's birthday is it??"

Luke said something humorous and I said, "Luke - you are so funny!"  He replied, "You're welcome!"

Beware the Ides of March!

I just called Aunt to leave her my annual "Beware the Ides of March" message.  I did a pretty good growly voice so she wouldn't know it was me.  (Too bad for caller ID, right?)
Luke was in the other room and when he heard me, he came flying in here looking very nervous and yelled, "What was that noise?!?"
So I probably didn't scare Aunt but I am able to scare a 3-year-old.  Nice.

Love is Just Ducky

In the car today, Luke kept yelling "Boom!" for some reason.  At one point, I yelled back, "Boom goes the dynamite!"
He giggled and said, "You are the funniest duck - I love you!"

FYI - He still calls me "puppy" 99% of the time.  Not sure why today I was a duck...

Walk Like an Egyptian

Andrew read a book about ancient Egypt yesterday and was talking about it with Ryan.  Andrew asked if he knew that the Nile river was really long.  Ryan said, "Yeah, it's over 300 feet long."  I heard this and said, "You know, 300 feet is only as long as a football field.  I bet it's longer than that."  He was quick to reply, "Well, I said it is OVER 300 feet."

Outlook is Sunny

Today is going to be warm so I got a short-sleeved shirt out of the closet for Luke.  He looked at it and said, "Yea!  A warm-sleeve shirt!"

Destined for Med School

I got a picture on my phone a few days ago showing an ultrasound of Allison's baby.  Apparently, it's been a long time since I read one because I thought it was a hand and it was actually the baby's profile.  

I showed it to Ryan to see if he could see the profile and he looked at it carefully.  All of the sudden, he yelled, "Holy cow!!  It's a girl!!"

When I asked how he knew that, he turned red and ran away.

He did tell me later that he saw that the baby had "puffy hair" and that's how he knew it was a girl.

Turns out he was right - it's a girl!!  

Welcome to your crazy family,  Haven!!

Space Invaders

We were at karate last night when I heard a commotion of sirens outside.  Luke looked out the window and told me he saw an ambulance and 2 police cars.  I said, "Wonder what happened?"
He looked very serious and said, "Aliens."

Hopefully not the Goat Kind

Our cousin, Allison, is having a baby in Florida - hopefully any day now!! They didn't find out if they are having a boy or girl and my boys have been guessing what it will be.
Today Luke told me that he knows what kind of baby Allison is going to have - "a kid baby."

The Smeller's the Feller.

Luke is potty training (FINALLY!!) and is doing great.  Hasn't had a wet pull-up in a week!  Last night at basketball practice he was running around and suddenly stopped and ran over to me.  He whispered,  "will you change my diaper?"
I was surprised but said, "Sure - did you go potty?"
He smiled and yelled (of course this part he yelled...), "No!  I tooted and it is stinky!!!"

Three's a Crowd

Ryan & Andrew were discussing how many kids they are going to have someday (hopefully a LONG time from now) and Ryan said he wanted 2 boys.  Andrew said, "I want twins.  No - I want triplets!"
Ryan frowned and said that wasn't a good idea because "three babies have a hard time getting out of a mommy's tummy.  They sometimes get stuck together."

Maybe

Out of the blue today in the carpool line, Luke asked me, "Are you a crazy person?"  He seemed very concerned that I was.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Star Wars Meets Twilight

The boys were playing Star Wars (which involves much sword-fighting for some reason) and Luke came sobbing into the room. I figured he'd been smacked with a sword but he looked fine.

Finally got him to tell us that he was upset because Andrew said he was a vampire.

When we asked Andrew to stop saying that, he said, "I wasn't calling him a vampire! I told him he was part of The Empire!!"

Funky Tacos

In one of the Shrek movies, the song Funky Town is played. Luke watches it often and loves the song. Today I heard him singing it and I thought it was so cute. Then I fell over laughing when I heard his lyrics. Instead of "talk about, talk about...", he sang, "taco bell, taco bell..."

I honestly don't know if he's eaten there more than twice in his life but he must pay attention to the ads!!!

Mr. President

This morning, Ryan reminded me that he needed a picture of himself to take to school. (Of course, this is as we were walking out the door).

I mumbled and headed to the printer. I asked him what kind of pic? What size?? Any details???

He said, "Oh I know exactly. I need to look like the President and it should be 4 by 2 and 8, 3."

Huh?

I Need to Lay Off the Valentine's Candy!

Leaving church this morning, Luke asked to "Hold you."
So I picked him up and sort of grunted with his weight.
He smiled and said, "You are getting so heavy!"

He Does Speak the Truth!

I recently bought Luke a shirt that says "My Mom Rocks!" I must admit that is true but it was also in the $2.50 clearance bin so how could I pass that up?
This morning, I was wearing a shirt with some writing on it. When I went to get Luke out of bed, he saw it and asked, "What that say? My baby rock??"
YES he does!!!

The Donut Method

This is how Luke eats a donut. Always around the edge. I think he thinks the inside part is "the crust."

The Elephant in the Room

At the doctor's office today, we were in the jungle room. The boys were doing a good job of entertaining each other by playing a game where one would ask the others to find the monkey, frog, lizard... There are a lot of small animals and such hidden all over the room. There is also a huge mural the size of the wall of an elephant. Luke kept asking them if they could find the elephant. Surprising him each time, they did find it.
And then he would shout his favorite phrase to say over the past few days, "Oh Man!!!"

Some Things Never Change

Today, Andrew and I went to see a Berenstain Bears play for a school field trip. Andrew was telling Ryan about it on the way home. Here is their conversation:

A: The play was so funny! You know how Papa Bear is kind of fat?

R: Oh yeah!

A: Well, he was dancing and bended over and his pants ripped on his bottom!

R: Oh my gosh!!

A: Yeah, and guess what? You could see his polka-dot underwear! He had to take his pants off and you could see all of his underwear!

R: Why is it always polka-dot? Was it red polka-dot?

A: Yes!

R: Always.

Prunes Don't have Germs

Luke joined the puking club last night.... in church... all over me and Don and the floor. Nice.

Anyway, I was getting him dressed after hosing him off and tried to prepare him that he wasn't going to get to go to school today. He of course argued and said, "Yes me is."

I told him that he had germs on him and he didn't want to share those with his friends.

He showed me his hands and said, "No me don't! I not got germs on here! I got prune fingers!"

How Do I Look?

The recent incident with Andrew reminded me of something that happened a while back.
We were at dinner and I noticed that Andrew had turned a sickly shade of green. I asked, "Andrew, are you feeling okay?"
He shook his head so Don took him to the restroom where things got ugly. Thank heavens he's too old to go in the girls' room with me!
So from that day forward, he often asks, "Do I look like I'm going to be sick?"
And it doesn't just happen when he's sick. It's quite random!

Not for the Squeamish

I was on the computer this morning when Andrew woke up and came in to talk to me. I looked up and saw him standing there covered in vomit! Literally, hair to toe.

Before I could say anything, he said very casually, "Mommy? I noticed my room doesn't smell very good and there's some sort of stuff on my pillow and bed."

Holy cow kid!!! I got him in the shower and went to his room and it looked like a scene from the exorcist. How on earth did he not know he threw up? And Ryan didn't hear him either!

And not to be even more gross, but from the looks of things, it had happened early in the night and been slept on for a while.

Talk about a deep sleeper.

Yippee!! Oh no!!!!

Told the boys last night that we are going to Disney World in May to celebrate my birthday. Much screaming and excitement. That is, until someone asked if we are driving or flying. When Andrew heard me say we were taking a plane, he did a complete turnaround and said no and began to cry!

We've got a few months to talk him into it - any help is much appreciated!! :)

For the video of the excitement - click here.

Monster Band

The boys were thankfully playing nicely with each other yesterday and decided to start a band. Andrew and Luke found "monster" masks and put them on and Monster Band was formed.

The best part was after the song (which consisted of the same lyrics over and over - Monster Band), Ryan said, "Man, that was a great song. We should go write that down."

If you want to check out their first music video on youtube, click here.

Pillow Pics

During the Christmas season, the boys did a good deed each day. One of the ones they most enjoyed was to color a picture and put it on someone's pillow for a bedtime surprise.

Today, Luke found a picture on the desk that Andrew had drawn. He brought it to me and said, "I put this on a pillow to be nice?" I said sure and he ran off.

I noticed later that he had put it on his own pillow!

Snow Bears

Luke noticed it was snowing today and said, "I go outside. Sammy and Harry not go outside. Only boys and bears go outside in snow."

Disney Magic

I gave Luke a package of his drug of choice - fruit snacks. He looked at them and asked what they were. I told him they were an assortment of Disney characters.

He squealed and yelled, "They from Disney World! How they get to my house!!"

And no, I promise I really haven't been talking up my intense desire to go back to Disney World this summer!! :)

Theeeey're Greeeat!

Just put Luke down for a nap and told him when he woke up, Nana would be here. He said, "Yeah and then you and Daddy go at movie. What you go see?"

I told him I didn't know yet.

He grimaced and said, "I think you go at that tiger eating movie."